"Man, I swear I thought you said 'Monogamous relationships are so hard.' I was like, nod and smile..."

Today is the second day of the Ludi Cereri.

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My Chemistry teacher is about ready to go postal on my class. Today the majority of the class was talking the whole time, as usual, and he was getting increasingly frustrated, as usual, and then he started layering on homework assignment after homework assignment, then he started telling us we would have to stay later (not that he could have prevented the leaving, people had a Biology test the following hour), then he finally broke down, spun around to face us, and cried, "Will you all just STOP DISRESPECTING ME?" We quieted.

"Seriously, ALL you guys do is TALK and I've just been trying to be a nice guy and make this class as easy as possible, and you have NEVER respected me. You know this class is the reason I'm quitting teaching? Just this class. I thought you should know, one of my colleagues said this was the worst class he's seen in thirty years. I wanted you to know that."

He turned to face the board, attempting to finish one last problem before we left for the weekend. The conversational murmur began to rise, and he steadily set down the chalk, slowly turned around, and said though tight lips, "You know what? Go. Just go. I'm not gonna care any more."

We left.

Man, Monday is gonna be awkward.

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In yoga today, the instructor randomly said we were doing partner yoga. Uh, partner yoga? Like pair off with someone and have to touch them? Not to mention that there was an even number of people, but an odd number of each gender, and I seemed like one of the only people who didn't know anyone, so I would either wind up with the thirtyish woman in the spandex blue flame pants if someone in the group had their significant other with them, or with a guy. And I would not have tolerated a GIRL touching me as I did yoga. I don't hug my friends or touch people on the arm as I talk, never mind hold their butt in place as I push on their back.

So I left as quietly as I could. Well, not so much "left" as "fled." Hopefully no one noticed... well, except whoever wound up partnered with the instructor because of me...

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Meanwhile I was all set for a Friday night spent talking for a bit with Mistake (Vivacia? I haven't decided), then doing some homework, finishing up my Adventures of the S-Team Submission contest submission and going to bed early, because Ryter was in Massachusetts seeing some movie about anthropomorphic food fighting subway bombs or something. Got the first done, at least, but I was working on my submission when there was a knock on my door. Surprised, I went over and opened it.

It was Ryter, back from Mass and stopping by after dropping off his movie buddy.

So me being sans makeup, with my hair a mess all over the place, wearing junky comfortable clothes, and having barely cleaned my room (I just made it tolerable before Mistake came, not really clean)? That was a problem.

I mean, yeah, like, he didn't seem to mind and he said I looked beautiful anyway, and he'd probably have to see me looking less-than-best eventually, but I check the hall before going to the bathroom in my PJ's and robe to make sure there aren't any males wandering around in the morning.

I am not so good with the surprise visits.

Awkward is as awkward does...

It's too late for a full-out entry, and Loquatia's having enough trouble sleeping as is. That said:

-Group is awesome. They make me laugh. Alas, I can no longer talk about my actual communication problems because most of them involve either how I might talk to a guy about relationship stuff. And I can't ask a group of mostly males how to talk about male-female interactions with males. So awesome, but useless. Is that okay?

-Awkward: Guys talking about stuff that gets tossed in the urinals. And knowing that it's totally your fault for mentioning Fruit Loop target practice at daycare.

-More awkward: Getting asked by someone you are dating "So what would you want your wedding to be like?" This is awkward no matter how hypothetical it is. It will continue to be awkward until you are actually planning a real wedding with the person.

-Even more awkward: Saying "Hmm, that's a little gay" as in, that thing reeks of homosexual undertones, then discovering, whoops, damn, your boyfriend's friend, whom you are meeting for the first time, is a homosexual. I'm sorry! I try not to stereotype people as homosexual if they lisp! No one warned me! Gah...

-Probably the most awkward EVER: Two guys talking about sex in front of you, in a totally casual tone, as you sit there awkwardly playing with your hair with a very intent look on your face, silently cursing yourself for mentioning how you first met your hall president when he was going door-to-door looking for a spooning partner for a friend of his, because it is totally inadvertently your fault that you are using your hair as a curtain to hide the blushing.

There should be more Star Trek drinking games. "Hot alien chick hit on Trip- take a drink!"

I woke up really, really late today; like, two in the afternoon, and then I started to read and the next thing I knew it was four in the afternoon and I hadn't done a single thing all day. Oops.

Today I got my laundry done and I sort of picked up, a little bit, but most of my limited day was devoted to talking to Writer Guy online (yes, again) and then watching Enterprise reruns on SciFi. Because I'm so productive...

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So... funny little story... I was talking to Writer Guy on the phone for two hours on Saturday night (because my internet connection was down, I don't normally subject my parents to crazy phone bills), and besides the fact that The Brother was very irritated that my long conversation meant he couldn't talk to his girlfriend, something interesting came up in conversation.

Namely, my "online persona." Basiorana, that is. The name that I use in online forums and on my blog-- basically, anytime you see "Basiorana" anywhere on the internet it's me, and the same is true for my alternate identity (an older one), Zennybee. Writer Guy, like so many before him, was curious as to what "Basiorana" meant.

Well, you may know that it is from the Latin words "basio," meaning "I kiss," and "rana," meaning "frog," coming from my blog title and the old fairy tale, which is one of my favorites. But how, exactly, do you tell someone that your internet persona means "I kiss the frog" when they are someone that you may very well be kissing in the future? It was weird enough telling Mack.

My explanation was rather convoluted and sounded a bit like a lesson in Latin grammar with a few mumbled references to fairy tales...

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Since I don't have anything interesting to say on my own I've decided I should probably update my Readings and add some other blogs you should check out. Plus delete the ones that haven't had anything posted in a long enough time that I think they've been abandoned.

But yes, some new people to check out: First, there's EDog's Everything Page, which is the life blog of the dude who does the very funny webcomic Adventures of the S-Team, which has superheroes and robots and aliens, recently, so it's very funny. Anyway, I feel kind of bad that it took me so ridiculously long to figure out that he had a life blog too, in addition to the blog about the comic... but yeah. Oh well.

Another addition: Sam Girl, who hails from South Africa, which honestly feels a lot farther away to me than it actually is... But then again I tend to think of Russia as farther away than Australia, so clearly my sense of distance is a little wonky.

I Am 50% Left Brained, 50% Right Brained

The left side of the brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning. Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others. My left brain's influence makes me fairly logical and prefers dogs, reading, and quiet. The right side of the brain is all about creativity and flexibility. Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way. Since I'm half right brained, I likely have a talent for creative writing and art. My right brain prefers day dreaming and philosophy.

Are You Right or Left Brained?

"You are a Person of Culture, Cultivate It"

It's the festival of Hecate At the Crossroads, today. You may have heard of Hecate, but if you have, it's probably as the witch-goddess because that's how disaffected Hellenistic Neopagan teenagers like to see her, so they can call her their patron goddess and dress all in black and pretend to communicate with the dead. Or maybe you've just read Shakespeare's Macbeth. But in reality, while she was goddess of witchcraft and necromancy, that wasn't the most important aspect of her.

As goddess of crossroads, Hecate was depicted as having three faces- a young woman's, a middle-aged woman's, and an old woman's. Three masks would be placed on a pole at the crossroad (a Y-intersection) so each faced a different direction. This festival honored that aspect of the goddess-- as a deity of the wilderness and untamed areas. Travelers left her food as offerings to ensure safe passage through dangerous areas-- especially women who were traveling alone.

If you go onto Hellenismos discussion boards talking about who people feel is their patron god or goddess, a lot of people claim Hecate. This amuses me because half of them haven't a clue what she's about except that the witchcraft connection will annoy their parents.

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Last night at lab I switched partners, but I swear it wasn't because the girls kicked me out. My new lab partner just joined the class and she knew me from Classical Mythology last semester. I'll mention her enough to name her, I guess... Her name will be Maritima ("Of the sea," because she's studying marine biology). Anyway, the lab thing worked out anyway, for last week-- turns out the group section of the lab wasn't that big a deal.

In other lab news, turns out I don't have to worry about lab reports for Biology. You have no idea how happy I was when I learned this. I was dancing. On the inside, because I was in Chem lab.

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Today's Bio lab took forever. I was so proud that I left yoga early enough to get there on time, with enough time to make sure I looked reasonably presentable and didn't smell (which meant five minutes early). But then I was looking at bacteria and protists for hours and I had to squeeze the wood-digesting bacteria out of a termite's butt, and the first time I didn't do it right and the second time I squeezed too hard, killed it, and still didn't do it right, so the professor had to do it for me on account of my lab partner being adverse to the squeezing of termites. The professor didn't even try to be humane, like I had been- he just disemboweled the little bug and tossed him aside, without even crushing his head so he'd die fast. And the professor didn't even do it quickly enough! Termite butt bacteria-- which, in case you're curious, are the things that make it possible for termites to digest wood-- can't survive long exposed to oxygen, and he waited too long before he put the cover slip on so the bacteria was dead anyway. I mean, we saw them, but not for very long.

Plus Maritima, who is also in Bio, was asking for a partner for this project we're doing on phyla, and I thought to myself, "I'd love to, as long as we aren't expected to work with our regular lab partners" but it came out as "Well, uhm, okay, but I have to, uhm, ch-check with my lab partner, but if she doesn't, like-- if she doesn't want to work with me, then I-- I mean, I guess..."

At that, she said, "Oh, okay, it's cool," and then another guy came up behind us and said, "Maritima, I don't have a partner for the project" (except he used her real name). So she partnered with him, on account of his actually being able to talk correctly, and then I learned that my lab partner already had a project partner and I would up having to wait around until everyone else partnered off. Luckily the girl who wound up without a partner was my lab partner last semester, so it's not a total stranger. Or a guy.

I really do talk like that, by the way. And Maritima's a girl, so it's not just guys that make me stammer. If I don't know someone, or I only know them a little, or I feel uncomfortable around them for any reason, it comes out peppered with "uhms" and half-finished sentences trailing off into new phrases. I basically have to have my words prepared ahead of time, in my head at least.

I wasn't exactly expecting Maritima to ask me to work with her right after she asked Incredibly Hot Guy (who's best friend, Flirts With TAs, is in the class so he had a partner already). I mean, like, hell of a comedown. Thus, I was hopelessly unprepared.

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Anyway, lab had plenty of awkwardness, for me, and it let out at 4:45, giving me fifteen minutes to run back to my dorm, get my personal statement for the Healthcare seminar thing, and run back to Dimond Library for the 5:00 meeting. Then I read my stupid personal statement on "Why I want to be a doctor--" you know, I had the worst trouble writing that, because I honestly haven't a clue why I want to be a doctor. But that's an issue for another day. I spouted off something about fascination with human physiology that made me sound cold and a great deal like Dr. House, and then ran back here at 5:30 to quickly change my shirt and go to dinner with Loquatia before swing class.

I was tired and under dressed-- I was still wearing workout pants and I'd just thrown on a T-shirt in my rush, and everyone else looked like they were going to class-- when I got to Swing, and emotionally, I was completely frazzled. Add in the fact that this week, the numbers of attractive guys without pre-determined dance partners (I don't know if they were single-- but they didn't have dance partners) was double last week's number and that we were learning new steps very quickly, and you have me stammering and stumbling around for an hour, watching the clock and wishing my hands weren't sweating so much.

Great.

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What is it about Wednesdays? They sucked last semester, too.

My Social Anxiety Level: 68%

"You have high social anxiety. You have a pretty serious social phobia, and it effects your life more than you may realize. It's possible that you've made yourself comfortable by avoiding situations you dread. But don't be fooled - you still probably need professional help." Yeah, well, tell me something I don't know...

Are You Socially Anxious?