Last night I had another story dream.
A young woman in a wealthy society had two lovers, one who looked like George Clooney and one who looked like Adrien Grenier, and she was secretly dating/sleeping with them both. She was invited to a weekend event held at an old mansion converted into a summer resort, and all her friends and some of her family was there-- and unfortunately, the two lovers were both invited.
She was remarkably sneaky in managing to keep her two secrets separate from both each other and the rest of the group, which pleased her no end. One afternoon she told the older lover that she would meet him in his room, and she went outside to get a breath of fresh air and so that her sister would think she was gone to walk in the garden. However, as she turned to reenter the house, there was a massive explosion-- someone had planted a bomb in the house, and she watched it explode right in the area of the house where she knew her younger lover to be. As people fled the area, headed for the lake or their cars, a second explosion went off-- this time closer to where she knew the older man she had planned to meet was.
Flash forward several months, and she's visiting a hospital. She goes to see her older lover, who is recovering well but severely disfigured; she then goes to see the younger one-- who is severely brain damaged and missing his legs, and sits on the floor of a padded room drawing in crayon. She has realized that of the two lovers, she was truly in love with the younger-- but because she had tried to have both at once, neither would ever be whole.
She left the hospital and met with an old man who told her he had a solution-- that he could send her back in time to occupy her body for the day of the explosion. She immediately agreed, and soon she was back that day; however, this time she changed her path. She paid a soothsayer and sent him to her older lover's room, claiming it was to be a fun little gift and she would join him soon; she then told the younger one she would meet him in his room instead. However, the soothsayer drugged the older lover's tea, and, per his instructions, dragged the man into the closet and pulled down clothes to pack around him. She had noticed that the items in the closet had been mostly out of reach of the second blast.
Meanwhile she met the younger lover, not dallying in the garden, and she told him she loved him, and they made love in his bed right before the blast went off. However, as they were farther from the center of the blast and they were in the bed, they were merely jostled and hit by splinters of wood.
A few days later, she is sitting with the younger lover in the hospital garden. They're recovering from the injuries, which aren't very severe, although he has trouble walking due to a shard of wood that hit his leg. Suddenly she sees the older lover walk by, glance at them, and walk faster. Giving her younger lover a reassuring kiss, she runs after the older one.
"I'm sorry," she said to him, once she caught him.
"You should be," he replied. "You played me like a fool. And then you chose him over me." It seems that in the rescue, the truth of her relationship with the younger beau became very apparent. "You hurt me."
"I saved you," she replied. "Why do you think that soothsayer drugged you? Why were you in that closet, protected from the blast?"
"You couldn't have known that ahead of time," the older man scoffed.
"I saw what happened to you-- saw you hit by the blast, your face practically blown off..."
"What are you talking about?"
"I knew. I did it to save you."
"You couldn't have... You didn't have anything to do with the blast, did you?"
"No!"
That's when I woke up. You know, for me, dreaming is a bit like watching 3/4ths of a movie and then having to turn off the TV. Annoying.
Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
I haven't forgotten, but I don't dwell.
The Ludi Romani continues.
---------------------------------
I was talking to Cellamica at dinner today, and the topic strayed over towards previous roommates, and she shared a very interesting story with me...
Imagine you're sleeping in a dorm room, and you wake up and the bunk is shaking. You look around sleepily, then, you happen to glance into the unfortunately-positioned mirror to see two sets of feet hanging out of the bunk over you, and a squirming set of bodies under a blanket.
Her roommate was having sex. In the top bunk of a bunk bed. While she was sleeping underneath.
I can't imagine what I would do in that situation. She said she just turned over and tried to not think about it, I mean, it's not like she could leave without it being awkward, and it was apparently really early in the morning...
I'm just amazed she didn't immediately request a roommate switch, I would have. But instead she stuck it out, and a while later she was working on her computer and her roommate had sex with a guy on the top bunk while she was in the room, and clearly awake. All that was covering them was a sheet.
God. That is just... man. Wow.
Best part? This girl is a girl that Ryter once mentioned to me before, in the context of "I once was attracted to her," so I got to inform him with a bit more glee than was probably fair that he was once attracted to an incredibly inconsiderate slut (to be fair, he stopped liking her when he started picking up on how obnoxious she was). Whee!
---------------------------------
My Ecology lab was outside today. It was raining. As in, downpour. It was depressing not only because I got soaked despite Cellamica loaning me her umbrella, but also because it was a really interesting lecture-- at least the parts I could hear while the rain drummed down on my umbrella and those of the people around me, and on the brook we were looking at. He was talking about invasive species, the species of plant that humans introduced to the area that have been damaging local environments, and he was throwing in survival tips as he went, like "This is poison ivy, note the shape of the leaves;" "Crush up the berries of this kind of sumac and you can make a kind of lemonade;" "The juice of this native kind of impatiens is an antidote to poison ivy," and "Do not eat any part of this plant or you will die immediately," which I kind of wish I could have heard the name for, in retrospect, especially after that lovely story about that gardener who mistook a root of it for a ground potato, ate it, and died.
Not that I normally go about eating random tubers I dig up. But knowing that the antidote to poison ivy grows all over College Ravine is useful. I just wish I could have listened to that lecture without mud in my shoes.
I was talking to Cellamica at dinner today, and the topic strayed over towards previous roommates, and she shared a very interesting story with me...
Imagine you're sleeping in a dorm room, and you wake up and the bunk is shaking. You look around sleepily, then, you happen to glance into the unfortunately-positioned mirror to see two sets of feet hanging out of the bunk over you, and a squirming set of bodies under a blanket.
Her roommate was having sex. In the top bunk of a bunk bed. While she was sleeping underneath.
I can't imagine what I would do in that situation. She said she just turned over and tried to not think about it, I mean, it's not like she could leave without it being awkward, and it was apparently really early in the morning...
I'm just amazed she didn't immediately request a roommate switch, I would have. But instead she stuck it out, and a while later she was working on her computer and her roommate had sex with a guy on the top bunk while she was in the room, and clearly awake. All that was covering them was a sheet.
God. That is just... man. Wow.
Best part? This girl is a girl that Ryter once mentioned to me before, in the context of "I once was attracted to her," so I got to inform him with a bit more glee than was probably fair that he was once attracted to an incredibly inconsiderate slut (to be fair, he stopped liking her when he started picking up on how obnoxious she was). Whee!
My Ecology lab was outside today. It was raining. As in, downpour. It was depressing not only because I got soaked despite Cellamica loaning me her umbrella, but also because it was a really interesting lecture-- at least the parts I could hear while the rain drummed down on my umbrella and those of the people around me, and on the brook we were looking at. He was talking about invasive species, the species of plant that humans introduced to the area that have been damaging local environments, and he was throwing in survival tips as he went, like "This is poison ivy, note the shape of the leaves;" "Crush up the berries of this kind of sumac and you can make a kind of lemonade;" "The juice of this native kind of impatiens is an antidote to poison ivy," and "Do not eat any part of this plant or you will die immediately," which I kind of wish I could have heard the name for, in retrospect, especially after that lovely story about that gardener who mistook a root of it for a ground potato, ate it, and died.Not that I normally go about eating random tubers I dig up. But knowing that the antidote to poison ivy grows all over College Ravine is useful. I just wish I could have listened to that lecture without mud in my shoes.
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Awkward is as awkward does...
It's too late for a full-out entry, and Loquatia's having enough trouble sleeping as is. That said:
-Group is awesome. They make me laugh. Alas, I can no longer talk about my actual communication problems because most of them involve either how I might talk to a guy about relationship stuff. And I can't ask a group of mostly males how to talk about male-female interactions with males. So awesome, but useless. Is that okay?
-Awkward: Guys talking about stuff that gets tossed in the urinals. And knowing that it's totally your fault for mentioning Fruit Loop target practice at daycare.
-More awkward: Getting asked by someone you are dating "So what would you want your wedding to be like?" This is awkward no matter how hypothetical it is. It will continue to be awkward until you are actually planning a real wedding with the person.
-Even more awkward: Saying "Hmm, that's a little gay" as in, that thing reeks of homosexual undertones, then discovering, whoops, damn, your boyfriend's friend, whom you are meeting for the first time, is a homosexual. I'm sorry! I try not to stereotype people as homosexual if they lisp! No one warned me! Gah...
-Probably the most awkward EVER: Two guys talking about sex in front of you, in a totally casual tone, as you sit there awkwardly playing with your hair with a very intent look on your face, silently cursing yourself for mentioning how you first met your hall president when he was going door-to-door looking for a spooning partner for a friend of his, because it is totally inadvertently your fault that you are using your hair as a curtain to hide the blushing.
-Group is awesome. They make me laugh. Alas, I can no longer talk about my actual communication problems because most of them involve either how I might talk to a guy about relationship stuff. And I can't ask a group of mostly males how to talk about male-female interactions with males. So awesome, but useless. Is that okay?
-Awkward: Guys talking about stuff that gets tossed in the urinals. And knowing that it's totally your fault for mentioning Fruit Loop target practice at daycare.
-More awkward: Getting asked by someone you are dating "So what would you want your wedding to be like?" This is awkward no matter how hypothetical it is. It will continue to be awkward until you are actually planning a real wedding with the person.
-Even more awkward: Saying "Hmm, that's a little gay" as in, that thing reeks of homosexual undertones, then discovering, whoops, damn, your boyfriend's friend, whom you are meeting for the first time, is a homosexual. I'm sorry! I try not to stereotype people as homosexual if they lisp! No one warned me! Gah...
-Probably the most awkward EVER: Two guys talking about sex in front of you, in a totally casual tone, as you sit there awkwardly playing with your hair with a very intent look on your face, silently cursing yourself for mentioning how you first met your hall president when he was going door-to-door looking for a spooning partner for a friend of his, because it is totally inadvertently your fault that you are using your hair as a curtain to hide the blushing.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
"I totally fail at pinecone hunting!"
Today is a day to leave sacrifices at the tombs of your ancestors. Well, graves, for us. Not a lot of "tombs" today.
It's also the birth date of Sol/Helios and Luna/Selene, the sun and the moon. Incidentally, until about 336 CE, this was the Nativity of Jesus as well. Besides the significance of Jesus being born on the same day as the sun was thought to have been created by the Romans, there's the fact that Jesus' birthday moves. I actually would rather believe it was today, though, because it makes more sense. I mean, that they would celebrate it at this time, when it actually occurred, and then moved it to midwinter to prevent people from celebrating pagan solstice holidays.
--------------------------
There were leeches in Biology lab today... I gave my presentation on kinorhynchs, those fascinating little mud dragons (dripping with sarcasm here), and I only started stammering a couple times, so despite the fact that apparently the professor only heard every fifth word that came out of my mouth at a very low volume, I think it was okay.
Sort of.
Anyway, then we were studying worms, including flatworms (Planaria are so cute!), roundworms (freakin' SCARY under a microscope), and segmented worms, including leeches.
Let me explain. I'm petrified of leeches. Very few things gross me out; I don't mind most bugs and I played with a tarantula today (she's part of next week's lab but the TAs were playing with her). I can handle mosquitoes and needles and I can
handle earthworms. But two things really gross me out. One of them is ticks, and the other is leeches. And the latter was part of the lab today.
I mean, I bit my lip and drew the stupid thing, but that was only because it was firmly contained in a jar of water with a tightly attached lid. But ohhhh, I hate leeches.
--------------------------
So Loquatia was talking on the phone today (I can't help eavesdropping! It's a small room!), and she was talking about this ID thing she went to last night. Apparently the guy mostly confused her, because he was talking about science, so she decided that she wanted to review arguments that weren't so sciency, and were by Young Earth creationists so they actually went over the "evidence" for Genesis as opposed to just talking about how there needed to be some creator, any creator. So she asked her folks to send her some stuff by Kent Hovind.
...Wow.
Kent Hovind.
As in, the one guy less credible on the subject of the origin of life than that crazy hobo I saw once on a city street with a sign saying "God's a pervert-- he's WATCHING you."
As in, the guy that creationists say "[does] the creationist cause no good." Even creationists don't buy the shit this guy makes up. He got his doctorate in Christian Education from an unaccredited college in a freakin' trailer and says he's capable of teaching science and math to kids. Every argument he uses is incorrect, five times worse than average...
Alas, before I tell Loquatia that her great, authoritative source on all things scientific is currently in jail for tax fraud I need to find a more credible (not that hard) source for creation science ideas to show her. Alas, that means putting aside my incredible skepticism and reading creationism sites...
Or I could just not care.
--------------------------
In other news relating to Xtreme Christianity (the X makes it cooler, but if I put it there it's still PC), this site is absolutely HILARIOUS (Warning: Not work-safe, or, in my case, roommate-safe). This guy takes Biblical passages WAY out of context in order to justify what he believes is okay bedroom behavior.
Basically, he says:
-Anal sex is okay, and it's okay for it to be done before marriage-- but only with women.
-Oral sex is okay, also okay out of marriage, but only with women, again-- and the Bible encourages it. But the woman has to swallow.
-Threesomes are okay, as long as two of the participants are a married couple and the other one is a woman (NOT a man), a "lipstick" lesbian, and lets the man call all the shots.
-Masturbation is awesome!
-"Educational" porn: also awesome. But the actors can't swear, because that would be wrong.
-Bondage is okay, as long as the woman is the submissive one.
-Fisting also God's will.
...If more Bible-belt Christian boys read this site, there would be a lot more premarital shackin' up going on. "But honey, anal's okay before marriage-- the Bible says so!"
--------------------------
Sorry my entries have been so long lately. I promise to become boring again post-haste.
It's also the birth date of Sol/Helios and Luna/Selene, the sun and the moon. Incidentally, until about 336 CE, this was the Nativity of Jesus as well. Besides the significance of Jesus being born on the same day as the sun was thought to have been created by the Romans, there's the fact that Jesus' birthday moves. I actually would rather believe it was today, though, because it makes more sense. I mean, that they would celebrate it at this time, when it actually occurred, and then moved it to midwinter to prevent people from celebrating pagan solstice holidays.
There were leeches in Biology lab today... I gave my presentation on kinorhynchs, those fascinating little mud dragons (dripping with sarcasm here), and I only started stammering a couple times, so despite the fact that apparently the professor only heard every fifth word that came out of my mouth at a very low volume, I think it was okay.
Sort of.
Anyway, then we were studying worms, including flatworms (Planaria are so cute!), roundworms (freakin' SCARY under a microscope), and segmented worms, including leeches.Let me explain. I'm petrified of leeches. Very few things gross me out; I don't mind most bugs and I played with a tarantula today (she's part of next week's lab but the TAs were playing with her). I can handle mosquitoes and needles and I can
handle earthworms. But two things really gross me out. One of them is ticks, and the other is leeches. And the latter was part of the lab today.I mean, I bit my lip and drew the stupid thing, but that was only because it was firmly contained in a jar of water with a tightly attached lid. But ohhhh, I hate leeches.
So Loquatia was talking on the phone today (I can't help eavesdropping! It's a small room!), and she was talking about this ID thing she went to last night. Apparently the guy mostly confused her, because he was talking about science, so she decided that she wanted to review arguments that weren't so sciency, and were by Young Earth creationists so they actually went over the "evidence" for Genesis as opposed to just talking about how there needed to be some creator, any creator. So she asked her folks to send her some stuff by Kent Hovind.
...Wow.
Kent Hovind.
As in, the one guy less credible on the subject of the origin of life than that crazy hobo I saw once on a city street with a sign saying "God's a pervert-- he's WATCHING you."
As in, the guy that creationists say "[does] the creationist cause no good." Even creationists don't buy the shit this guy makes up. He got his doctorate in Christian Education from an unaccredited college in a freakin' trailer and says he's capable of teaching science and math to kids. Every argument he uses is incorrect, five times worse than average...Alas, before I tell Loquatia that her great, authoritative source on all things scientific is currently in jail for tax fraud I need to find a more credible (not that hard) source for creation science ideas to show her. Alas, that means putting aside my incredible skepticism and reading creationism sites...
Or I could just not care.
In other news relating to Xtreme Christianity (the X makes it cooler, but if I put it there it's still PC), this site is absolutely HILARIOUS (Warning: Not work-safe, or, in my case, roommate-safe). This guy takes Biblical passages WAY out of context in order to justify what he believes is okay bedroom behavior.Basically, he says:
-Anal sex is okay, and it's okay for it to be done before marriage-- but only with women.
-Oral sex is okay, also okay out of marriage, but only with women, again-- and the Bible encourages it. But the woman has to swallow.
-Threesomes are okay, as long as two of the participants are a married couple and the other one is a woman (NOT a man), a "lipstick" lesbian, and lets the man call all the shots.
-Masturbation is awesome!
-"Educational" porn: also awesome. But the actors can't swear, because that would be wrong.
-Bondage is okay, as long as the woman is the submissive one.
-Fisting also God's will.
...If more Bible-belt Christian boys read this site, there would be a lot more premarital shackin' up going on. "But honey, anal's okay before marriage-- the Bible says so!"
Sorry my entries have been so long lately. I promise to become boring again post-haste.
Wednesday, December 6, 2006
Quick Update and a Funny Bit Of Rambling
There was a death in my family yesterday. A very nice man, my father's brother-in-law's father, died at the age of- well, I can't remember the exact number, but over 90. He'd been sick for a while; I confess I'm not horribly shocked. Still, it's sad. I don't know if I'll be able to go to the funeral or not, considering that it's in Somerville, Mass, this weekend. I feel kinda bad- I want to pay my respects- but I don't think it will work out. It's a pretty long drive, especially when you tack on an extra hour for my parents to come get me.
-----------------------
Not much else to report; my life has been consumed by schoolwork. Tacita's definitely moving out next semester, it's finalized and everything. I've been eating lots of Ramen noodles. As in, an extreme amount. Like, that's all I eat for lunch and dinner. I feel collegiate. Or maybe just poor.
There's a holiday dinner tonight, though. Best go early.
-----------------------
Oh, but today in Myth class, the professor was talking about Achilles, the Greek hero of the Trojan War. See, Achilles' prophetic mother Thetis knew that if Achilles went to war, he'd die there. So Thetis dressed Achilles like a woman and sent him to live on the island of Scyros, hiding among the king's daughters. The Greeks discovered him when they came to Scyros, looking for him, and tested Lycomedes' wives and children by placing out two boxes as if they were merchants. The first box had combs, and jewels, and pretty clothes; the second had cool weaponry. Of course, Achilles went for the swords, while the women looked at the jewels, and the ruse was discovered, so he went to war after all.
Now, I'm sitting there smiling to myself as Clairmont says this, because I'm thinking about what it says about society at that time and the misogynism of Homer that a girl can't play with weaponry (I mean, really- clothes and jewels or a sharp blade? Which would you choose?). Then he says, "Now, one of the girls DID discover that Achilles was a young man, and she became pregnant..."
Oh yeah. THAT'S why girls don't play with swords.
Seriously, can you imagine how that went? Deidameia walks in on Achilles changing or something, and says, "Oh, I'm sorr- OH MY GOD YOU'RE NOT A GIRL! ...you're not a girl... and... WOW you wanna put that away? I mean, uhm... yeah... well... I guess I can overlook the fact that you've been cros-sdressing and hiding amongst my sisters and I for a while, and we'll just have sex right now, shall we?"
And naturally, Achilles is a hero, so he must have superior sperm. Like Heracles, who I like to think of as "Slow-Withdraw McGraw" or "Why They Invented Condoms." Honestly, not even Zeus had that many children in a 40-year-lifespan. For some reason, being a war hero with divine parentage means that you're free from impotence. Luckily for them, patrimony was a later invention.
It's probably for the best that anyone today boasting a divine parent lives in a box and wears tinfoil on their head. Besides the adversity Achilles would have to Trojans, your average hero would spend a FORTUNE in child support.
-----------------------
Not much else to report; my life has been consumed by schoolwork. Tacita's definitely moving out next semester, it's finalized and everything. I've been eating lots of Ramen noodles. As in, an extreme amount. Like, that's all I eat for lunch and dinner. I feel collegiate. Or maybe just poor.
There's a holiday dinner tonight, though. Best go early.
-----------------------
Oh, but today in Myth class, the professor was talking about Achilles, the Greek hero of the Trojan War. See, Achilles' prophetic mother Thetis knew that if Achilles went to war, he'd die there. So Thetis dressed Achilles like a woman and sent him to live on the island of Scyros, hiding among the king's daughters. The Greeks discovered him when they came to Scyros, looking for him, and tested Lycomedes' wives and children by placing out two boxes as if they were merchants. The first box had combs, and jewels, and pretty clothes; the second had cool weaponry. Of course, Achilles went for the swords, while the women looked at the jewels, and the ruse was discovered, so he went to war after all.
Now, I'm sitting there smiling to myself as Clairmont says this, because I'm thinking about what it says about society at that time and the misogynism of Homer that a girl can't play with weaponry (I mean, really- clothes and jewels or a sharp blade? Which would you choose?). Then he says, "Now, one of the girls DID discover that Achilles was a young man, and she became pregnant..."
Oh yeah. THAT'S why girls don't play with swords.
Seriously, can you imagine how that went? Deidameia walks in on Achilles changing or something, and says, "Oh, I'm sorr- OH MY GOD YOU'RE NOT A GIRL! ...you're not a girl... and... WOW you wanna put that away? I mean, uhm... yeah... well... I guess I can overlook the fact that you've been cros-sdressing and hiding amongst my sisters and I for a while, and we'll just have sex right now, shall we?"
And naturally, Achilles is a hero, so he must have superior sperm. Like Heracles, who I like to think of as "Slow-Withdraw McGraw" or "Why They Invented Condoms." Honestly, not even Zeus had that many children in a 40-year-lifespan. For some reason, being a war hero with divine parentage means that you're free from impotence. Luckily for them, patrimony was a later invention.
It's probably for the best that anyone today boasting a divine parent lives in a box and wears tinfoil on their head. Besides the adversity Achilles would have to Trojans, your average hero would spend a FORTUNE in child support.
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